FLOWS

mix media on canvas

24” x 30” x 3pcs


April 2008 - Jun 2010 displayed at Colossal Art
3, Bangunan Stadium MPS, Jalan 2/2, Bandar Baru Selayang,
68100 Batu Caves, Selangor Darul Ehsan.

RM649 Knock Down Price July 2010
SOLD to Pn Azra Misnan,
Ayer Keroh, Melaka, Malaysia.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Had this idea while having breakfast and looking at my cereal box...
thought of some flower which i forget the name. it's red, orange and green mix? Halconea?

Not really happy with this piece, i think there's something "off". well, leave it be first. maybe i might like it someday or else, just repaint the whole thing!

FALLEN III

acrylic on canvas
36” x 48”


-------------------------------------------------------------------

Another piece for my Fallen Series.
Just in different material, colours, brush stroke and feelings =)

MUSE II

acrylic on canvas
30” x 40”

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Unwritten by Natasha Beddingfields

I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We've been conditioned to not make mistakes
But I can't live that way

MUSE I

acrylic on canvas
30” x 40”

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Single by Natasha Beddingfields

Ah yeah that's right
All you single people out there
This is for you

I'm not waitin' around for a man to save me
(Cos I'm happy where I am)
Don't depend on a guy to validate me
(No no)
I don't need to be anyone's baby
(Is that so hard to understand?)
No I don't need another half to make me whole

Make your move if you want doesn't mean I will or won't
I'm free to make my mind up you either got it or you don't

This is my current single status
My declaration of independence
There's no way I'm tradin' places
Right now a star's in the ascendant

I'm single (Right now)
That's how I wanna be
I'm single (Right now)
That's how I wanna be

Don't need to be on somebody's arm to look good
(I like who I am)
I'm not saying I don't wanna fall in love 'cos I would
I'm not gonna get hooked up just 'cos you say I should
(Can't romance on demand)
I'm gonna wait so I'm sorry if you misunderstood

Everything in it's right time everything in it's right place
I know I'll settle down one day
But 'til then I like it this way it's my way
Eh I like it this way

SERENITY III

acrylic on canvas
18” x 30”


April 2008 - Jun 2010 displayed at Colossal Art
3, Bangunan Stadium MPS, Jalan 2/2, Bandar Baru Selayang,
68100 Batu Caves, Selangor Darul Ehsan.

July 2010 Knock Down Price
at Srikandi Exclusive Hi-Tea Event, 
Royal Bintang Hotel, Mutiara Damansara.


RM300 SOLD to Pn Adibah Alip,
Kota Damansara, Selangor, Malaysia.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

still on Cherating mood :)
and Jack Johnson's songs still plays in my mind...

SERENITY II

acrylic on canvas
18” x 30”

April 2008 - Jun 2010 displayed at Colossal Art
3, Bangunan Stadium MPS, Jalan 2/2, Bandar Baru Selayang,
68100 Batu Caves, Selangor Darul Ehsan.

July 2010 Knock Down Price
at Srikandi Exclusive Hi-Tea Event, 
Royal Bintang Hotel, Mutiara Damansara.


RM300 SOLD to Pn Sabrina Mohd Said,
Mantin, Negeri Sembilan, Malaysia.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

listening to this song reminds me my last trip to Cherating. hope to do that again soon! but this painting's not inspired by those pattern on the beach created by those little crabs but this was inspired by the huge gigantic jellyfish that we found on the beach, dead... and this look almost like the bottom part of that creature which is so poisonous and dangerous.

- Better Together by Jack Johnson -

There's no combination of words I could put on the back of a postcard
No song that I could sing but I can try for your heart
Our dreams, and they are made out of real things
Like a, shoebox of photographs with sepiatone loving

Love is the answer, At least for most of the questions in my heart
Like why are we here? And where do we go?
And how come it's so hard?
It's not always easy and sometimes life can be deceiving
I'll tell you one thing it's always better when we're together

Mmm, it's always better when we're together
Yeah, we'll look at the stars when we're together
Well, it's always better when we're together

And all of these moments just might find their way into my dreams tonight
But I know that they'll be gone when the morning light sings
And brings new things for tomorrow night you see
That they'll be gone too
Too many things I have to do
But if all of these dreams might find their way
Into my day to day scene
I'd be under the impression, I was somewhere in between
With only two, Just me and you
Not so many things we got to do or places we got to be
We'll Sit beneath the mango tree now

I believe in memories
They look so, so pretty when I sleep
Hey now, and when I wake up,
You look so pretty sleeping next to me
But there is not enough time,
And there is no, no song I could sing
And there is no, combination of words I could say
But I will still tell you one thing
We're better together.

ECSTACY II

acrylic on canvas
30” x 30”

Nov-Jan 2007 displayed at Baiti's Restaurant
36 Jalan Persiaran Zaaba, Taman Tun Dr Ismail, Kuala Lumpur.

July 2010 Knock Down Price
at Srikandi Exclusive Hi-Tea Event, 
Royal Bintang Hotel, Mutiara Damansara.


RM250 SOLD to Dr Norazlina Bachik,

Optimax Eye Specialist Centre,
Shah Alam, Selangor, Malaysia.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

another song that i really loves during those weekend :)


- Still Here by Natasha Bedingfield -

You looked at me and saw what I never could see
You made me feel more than I thought I could ever be
And when I needed a friend you were always there to lift me up
To make me strong
You're not gone

You're still here with me all the time
You're still here when I close my eyes
I still see you, I still feel you and we'll never be apart
You're still here, still here in my heart
In my heart

Because of you I knew how it felt to be loved
You made me feel beautiful 'cause you believed I was
And I will never forget how you touched my life
You made me feel like I belong
You live on

All my life
You'll be in my life
You'll be part of me
I'll just think of you and you'll still be
You'll still be here

ECSTACY I

acrylic on canvas
30” x 30”


July 2010 Knock Down Price
at Srikandi Exclusive Hi-Tea Event, 
Royal Bintang Hotel, Mutiara Damansara.


RM250 SOLD to Dr Norazlina Bachik,

Optimax Eye Specialist Centre,
Shah Alam, Selangor, Malaysia.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

one weekend when i was so boring and unwell. been sitting at home doing nothing and on medication for high fever, sore throat, cough and flu. i was downloading songs from the internet and my ears caught this song and it's been playing until at this very moment :)

- Soulmate by Natasha Bedingfield -

Incompatible, it don't matter though
'cos someone's bound to hear my cry
Speak out if you do
you're not easy to find

Is it possible Mr. Loveable
is already in my life?
right in front of me
or maybe you're in disguise

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
who knows how to love you without being told
somebody tell me why I'm on my own
if there's a soulmate for everyone

Here we are again, circles never end
how do I find the perfect fit
there's enough for everyone
but I'm still waiting in line

Most relationships seem so transitory
They're all good but not the permanent one

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
who knows how to love you without being told
somebody tell me why I'm on my own
if there's a soulmate for everyone

ENIGMA

acrylic on canvas
30” x 30”


Nov 2006 -Jan 2007 displayed at Baiti's Restaurant
36 Jalan Persiaran Zaaba, Taman Tun Dr Ismail, Kuala Lumpur.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

i can’t explain what it is that makes me feel this way, feel so trapped and chocked, smothered… when at the same time complaining of the distance. for the distance grows, almost, every day that passes and it seems as if i watch us slip like sand in my hand, falling through the creases of my fingers just as i try to hold tighter.

but just hold on… just be strong, be strong for us… just keep fighting… but it’s so hard to be so strong when so weak, it’s so hard to keep fighting when i wish it to just be. Why are we so different? Constant fighting for this to stay alive, through struggles that so many would not go through… why are we so different?

and so i seek to escape… i need to breathe… i need to think. for some reason, that seems rather hard lately. maybe because of your actions, your distance, your ignorance? i know not… all I know is that something feels different, something feels absent… and it pains me to be unable to place a finger upon it.

so i take to my bed… for in my mind, i’m so broken and there seems little else i can do. i wake from a short and troubled sleep… dreaming of you… but why!? why when i seek to escape you, you still linger on my mind, even my unconscious?

here she runs her hands over her face, up through her hair and letting out a quiet sigh.

i can’t stop thinking of you… i can’t stop thinking of the future that i wish to hold with you, when i can see you again. i remember… people said something about when people die, the best time of their life flashes before them… well it would be then for me too, for i had never spent so long in happiness, i’ve never felt like that before…

now she remembers him lying to her side… so she strokes the empty mattress, closing her eyes.

i know the distance is far… and it hurts me, it hurts me. and sometimes it seems like other things are more important, and i fall last on the list… yes, that may be true, and i should understand that, and i do… i know that you have higher priorities, and where you stand in life at this time, you should. but it hurts… it hurts knowing that… knowing how long i must wait for you… always waiting, always fighting…

…“but if you truly love someone… distance shouldn’t matter…”
…“you’re strong… you must be to withstand this…”
…“don’t do something you’ll regret… i don’t want anything to happen to you two…”

these words and many others echo through her mind, words of a stranger, and words from a dear friend.

i love him… i don’t want to lose him… i don’t want to give up the happiness that i know i can have… i don’t want to fight for this… but isn’t the fighting worth the prize in the end… for the prize is him… and i’ve waited so long for my knight in shining armour… it would just be foolish to throw it away…

a tear falls, trickling down her cheek in wounding pain.

…i can’t give up on this… i love him… i need him, i want him… i can’t imagine life without him… no, no, i can… and it’s a bitter and unhappy place where i wish to not exist… but maybe for now i just need some space…

she curls up against a pillow, remembering him there, letting her tears wash away the black streaks leaking from her eyes, wishing it were him, wishing he was here… then his words flash through her mind.

“…True love often isn’t easy…”

whatever it is my dear... you know who you are to me. my feelings towards you will never change. i will always love and care about you. maybe not here in this world but we will be reunite in the end at the other world. as for now, i will always pray for your happiness. no matter where you are and who are you with, you will always have a very special place in my heart and my soul.

Alias Yusof, thank you for everything.

SERENITY I

acrylic on canvas
30” x 30”

Nov-Jan 2007 displayed at Baiti's Restaurant
36 Jalan Persiaran Zaaba, Taman Tun Dr Ismail, Kuala Lumpur.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

i was walking on the beach in Cherating while having my 'run-away-break' from my hectic life with someone very close to my heart. there's this pattern on the sand, created by those small little creature which i think it's the small crab. i was amazed by that and start to think about having it on my canvass.

when we came back from our trip, we went to the art shop and bought our supplies [we shared the same passion too] and found this gel that can be used to get the moulding effect and whoaaa! i love this stuff!!! while molding the shape and also while splashing the colours this song played in my mind. basically this painting is everything i felt during those trip.

...and thank you Bebear...

- Mata Hati Jiwa by Awie -

Maafkan aku mengganggumu
Cuma ku ingin kau tahu
Ruangan dihatiku hanyalah untukmu

Hari hari ku yang berlalu
Riang ceria kernamu
Mana adanya aku pasti ada kamu

Andainya engkau tahu perasan hatiku
Pastinya kau kan tersenyum diwaktu manis harimu
Biarkan biar tahu teguh auranya cintaku kerana kamu
Kau sentiasa berada di mataku, hati dan jiwa

Maafkan aku mengganggumu
Dilewat malam malam mu
Inginku temanimu sebelum lenamu

Izinkan aku dekatimu
Inginku tawan cintamu
Agar dapat ku jadi dewata hatimu

ALLUSION III

acrylic on canvas
36” x 48”


Nov 2006 -Jan 2007 displayed at Baiti's Restaurant
36 Jalan Persiaran Zaaba, Taman Tun Dr Ismail, Kuala Lumpur.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

i tried to combined those two ideas [ALLUSION I & ALLUSION II] and choice of colours into one piece and this came out. well, enough of this stroke, lets try something else after this.

ALLUSION II

acrylic on canvas
36” x 48”

-------------------------------------------------------------------

after looking at the ALLUSION I, i came out with the second piece but in lighter and vibrant colours. well, i have to admit that i'm feeling on top of the world at the moment. with everything that start to fall into place, especially my career and my life. not so great but definitely better than ever!

thanks to my Daddykins, Alias Yusof, Jassmine Shadiqe, Puan Elya and Eppy for being my lights and guidance.

ALLUSION I

acrylic on canvas
36” x 48”

-------------------------------------------------------------------

i got an idea to paint this piece while looking at the smoke from my cigarette. it was in dark purple base before i splashed all sort of colours and mix it with brush. and i love the result! the only thing that bother me at this point of time, i think this image look striking compare to the real piece but i can rest assure that nothing beat the REAL STUFF! i'll leave it to you to judge once you've seen the original piece.

INNOCENCE

acrylic on canvas
30” x 40”

Nov 2006 -Jan 2007 displayed at Baiti's Restaurant
36 Jalan Persiaran Zaaba, Taman Tun Dr Ismail, Kuala Lumpur.

submitted for Open Show 2008
to exhibit at Shah Alam Gallery, Yayasan Seni Selangor.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

- Innocence by Avril Lavigne -

Waking up I see that everything is ok
The first time in my life and now it's so great
Slowing down I look around and I am so amazed
I think about the little things that make life great
I wouldn't change a thing about it
This is the best feeling

This innocence is brilliance - I hope that it will stay
This moment is perfect - Please don't go away
I need you now and I'll hold on to it
Don't you let it pass you by

I found a place so safe, not a single tear
The first time in my life and now it's so clear
Feel calm, I belong, I'm so happy here
It's so strong and now I let myself be sincere

I wouldn't change a thing about it
This is the best feeling

It's a state of bliss, you think you're dreaming
It's the happiness inside that you're feeling
It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry

This innocence is brilliance - Makes you wanna cry
This innocence is brilliance - Please don't go away
Cus I need you now and I'll hold on to it
Don't you let it pass you by

LUMINOUS

acrylic on canvas
18” x 18” x 2 pcs


April 2008 - Jun 2010 displayed at Colossal Art
3, Bangunan Stadium MPS, Jalan 2/2, Bandar Baru Selayang,
68100 Batu Caves, Selangor Darul Ehsan.

July 2010 Knock Down Price
RM199 SOLD to Pn Azra Misnan,
Ayer Keroh, Melaka, Malaysia.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

this painting was done by accident. i was planning to do something else but it turn out like this. i think it's like a butterfly. i squeezed the colour fron the tube onto one canvass with some pattern and place another piece of canvass onto it. so, this is the result.

- luminous -

Fly, little butterfly, fly so far away,
To a place where nothing hurts you
To a place where you can stay
To a place all alone
People vanish if you may.

Fly, little butterfly, a welcoming home anew,
To a place where everything is different
To a place you never knew
To a place of no disappointments
For failures there are few.

Fly, little butterfly, to that place you desire
To a place where you finally find your soul
To a place that calms your inner fire
To a place just you, and that other butterfly,
That place, you never tire.

SERENDIPITY I

acrylic on canvas
36” x 36” x 2 pcs


Nov 2006 - Jan 2007 displayed at Baiti's Restaurant
36 Jalan Persiaran Zaaba, Taman Tun Dr Ismail, Kuala Lumpur.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

i always feel like a freak because i'm never able to move on like normal people... some of them just by a second!. people just have an affair or even entire relationships. they break up and they forget!. they move on like they would have change brands of cereals...

i feel, i was never able to forget anyone i've been with... because each person had their own specific qualities. you can never replace anyone... what's lost is lost!... each relationship, when it's ends... really damages me. i never, never once fully recover. that's why i should be very and extremely careful with getting involved because it's hurts too much!!!...

i appreciate little things... i mean really little---little things. sometimes too little to be notice but i did. it's the same with people. i see their little details, so specific to each of them that move me and that i miss and will always miss... that's why no one can replace anyone because everyone is made of such beautiful, specific details.

lately, i wonder... am i ready for another relationship? is it because of i'm tired being alone? is it because of i've got nothing better else to do? nothing really can fill my time and my mind? am i really up for another venture? am i ready for another temporary happy moments? am i ready to get hurts? am i ready to share the burden? will i be ready to share good and bad news with someone else? will i treat that person right? will that person treat me right? will it be only filled with tears, like always? will it be a laugh, which very rare in my case? is it for eternity? is it only temporary like rainbows that will only shows up after the rain and gone while i'm still admiring and enjoying it? i wonder... and keep wondering...

i do want to have to someone that i can look up to. i do want someone to cherish and witness my days comes and goes by. but i know that i never have luck in this department. it always ends bad and destroyed me. i think i had enough of that and want to stay away from it. cuz nothing is permanent, nothing is eternity, nothing is bright, and i don't want to suffer again and again and again... as much as i want it, i know i can't allow it to happen...and i know, deep in my heart...

...i'm not ready yet!

INTOXICATED

acrylic on canvas
18” x 18” x 6 pcs

-------------------------------------------------------------------

sleepless night again

my imagination runs wild tonight,
about life, passion and love,
on my sleepless night...

be it artistry or maladroitness,
be it verve or liveliness,
be it fabrication or dismantlement,
be it realization or failure,
be it fantasy or reality,
be it ecstasy or melancholy,
be it genius or stupidity,
be it fidelity or disloyalty,
be it arrogance or modesty,
be it passion or apathy,
be it attraction or aversion,
be it love and hate...

there's a dialogue between heart and brain going on,
there's a conversation and discussion between soul and mind going on,
there's a debate and argument between feeling and thought going on,
on and on and on and on...

sometimes i wish, i can be selfish and rude...
sometimes i wish, i can just ignore the fact...
and at times i wish, i can just fade away...

why must it arrive when i don't want it?
why must it appear when i don't need it?
why must it be difficult and complicated?
must i choose when i don't have choice?
must i endure, forgo, suffer, surrender and sacrifice?

i said no to love and relationship,
2 best friend came into the picture,
both have their excellence and flaws,
i know the fact that if i choose one of them,
things are not gonna be like before,
let alone better...

should i walk away?
should i stick around?
will it make things better at the end of the day?
will they still be best friend?
can we still be friend?

maybe i should just let it be,
maybe i should just go with the flow,
maybe i should let the time decide,
maybe i should just be me...

CHARISMA

mix media on canvas
36” x 36” x 2 pcs

April 2008 - Jun 2010 displayed at Colossal Art
3, Bangunan Stadium MPS, Jalan 2/2, Bandar Baru Selayang,
68100 Batu Caves, Selangor Darul Ehsan.

Nov 2010 - May 2011 displayed at Zakuro 2 Japanese Restaurant,

Ground Floor, Lot 6, No.174-176 Jalan Ampang,

50450 Kuala Lumpur.

------------------------------------------------------------

Every time I think of you
I get a shot right through into a bolt of blue
It's no problem of mine but it's a problem I find
Living a life that I can't leave behind

Theres no sense in telling me
The wisdom of a fool won't set you free
But that's the way that it goes
And it's what nobody knows
And every day my confusion grows

Every time I see you falling
I get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for that final moment
You'll say the words that I can't say

I feel fine and I feel good
I feel like I never should
Whenever I get this way,
I just dont know what to say
Why cant we be ourselves
like we were yesterday...

I'm not sure what this could mean
I don't think you're what you seem
I do admit to myself.
That if I hurt someone else
Then we'd never see just what were meant to be?

LUNATIC

oil on canvas
30” x 40”


Nov 2006 - Jan 2007 displayed at Baiti's Restaurant,
36 Jalan Persiaran Zaaba, Taman Tun Dr Ismail, Kuala Lumpur.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Beneath the makeup,
the thick eyelashes,
with lips painted rouge,
and cheeks rosy red.

Beneath the clothes,
the fashions that make her,
just like everyone else,
covering her secrets.

Beneath the scars,
that push people away,
in disgust and in fear,
marks of mistakes.

Beneath these tears of sorrow,
pain, loneliness and self-reflection,
through the running makeup,
that drips onto her bare skin.

Beneath it all she is naked,
free of coloured perfections,
and fitted fashions,
rid of smiles that are fake,
and lies voiced frequently.

Appearing before you,
not in a dream, but reality.
This is who she is,
beneath it all- just a girl, just a girl…

…Won’t you tell her she’s beautiful?

TURMOIL

oil on canvas
36” x 48”

artwork submitted for Open Show 2008
to exhibit at Shah Alam Gallery, Yayasan Seni Selangor.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Here i am again,
Thinking about myself, my life, my career and my all...

Suddenly,
Feeling so angry,
with everything that happened...
Be it within my control,
or not within my reach...

What am i made of?
Am i made from steel?
that can be so hard but melted with fire?

Why am i so hard?
So hard till i can't even understand,
How can i be so tough!
Is it from the learning curve experienced?
From broken home and broken hearts?

Why am i so fragile?
So sensitive over smallest thing!
Is it because i kept everything within myself?
Not letting anyone to share the burden?
Even when i did, i always ended up in disappointments...

Why am i so confuse?
So lost in my own world!
Is it because i have too many unanswered questions?
And no one care to understand the situation?

Why do i care so much?
As if i have nothing else better to do!
Is it because i want to feel important?
Or it makes me happy by making others happy?
A very close friend of mine used to call me CANDLE
i burnt myself just to see other happy...
But am i? Do i? Hmmm...

Why am i so difficult?
I'm not trying to be one!
But it seems like it is my middle name or something?
They think i enjoyed doing these?
Enjoyed making fun that involved my feelings?
They think i do it on purpose?
Purposely hurting myself?

Why am i not easy to love?
Cuz i know how much i can give,
And it can be very much and overflow.
So, it better be the one that i think deserve it
and fight their way to win my heart...

What will make my day?
Someone who can talk and listen
at the same wave length of mine,
A sincere smile, a genuine heart,
A warm hugs and lots of kisses...

Where will i be near future?
Will i be happy? Will i die in my other half's arms?
Will i be there for the one i love?
Will i hurt that person?
Can that person forgive me?

Do i deserve to be love?
I always think i will loves many people,
But they come and go,
I'll fills up the emptiness and the sense of longing,
Once they get their grips and starting the trips,
I'm long gone from their life!

Am i being punished for all the mistakes i have done?
If yes, for how long? How long more shall i go through this process?
If no, then why???

Why is it hard for me to love and be loved in returns?
Am i that bad till i don't deserved one?
Am i that difficult?
Like everybody claims!!!
Fuck them!!!

Sometimes, i just wish that i will just fade away!
Away from all this!
I wish i can say 'NO' to love,
I can ignore those feelings,
I won't fall and fall and fall in love
... and fell out of it!

So, NO MORE!
FUCK ALL THESE DOGSHIT!
It's too painful to face and go through it
Over and over again!...

So, to those out there!
Stay out from me!
I'm dangerous and mean...
Don't you ever come close to me
Cuz i don't think i need more than my family
I had ENOUGH!!!
And i always wonder and ponder
And keep wondering and pondering

... how does it feels to be different from me?

SEIZURE

mix media on canvas
40” x 30”

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Just Another Check Marks

It's funny to think that I used to believe those simple words.
the ones that take so much courage to say, so much assurance.
But when you said them, I believed them every time...
for I simply couldn't see, why you wouldn't love me???

So you spoke of such love, numerous times.
showing me in many ways, the truth of that simple sentence.
And I believed it. ...foolheartedly, I believed you.
For how could you hold this feeling you said you did...
when you could so easily turn away from me and cast me from your life.

A remnant of a relationship.

So I have been labeled, and anything with any connection to me.
Just say what you're thinking, then I know that you must be:
all of those regrets of being with me,
of experiences with me...
of ever meeting me,
talking to me,
holding me,
touching me...
'loving' me.

You're a coward...
and oh how I know your hate of cowards.
Funny how you can't see what you've become.

And so what if I've found someone new?
Dare you think me a slut? just because someone happened to make me happy,
because chance fell into my lap, and before I knew it I was not saddened by your absence...

Go, then.
Call me a slut, a whore, a wench, say all your horrid labels that you think I shall wear.
Hand me my scarlet letter, that you somehow think I should place upon my breast.

It all hurts.
Your loss hurts.
Your absence hurts.
Your regrets, your hate, your abandonment.
It all hurts.

Love...
You don't know what love is...
and maybe, you never did...

I'm happy now,
... without you.
All you are is another check mark to the list
of people with regrets of being with me.